The Benefits of Asc

Believe it or not, it is entirely possible to benefit from the many avoidance tactics us ASc sufferers use.

One prime example which springs to mind is a recent escapade where I agreed to dog sit for a friend who was going away.

This little adventure took me deep into the heart of Neasden, a country where I have never been before. So, I got my passport ready and booked in at the doctors for all the requisite jabs.

While I have friends who live in North London, I only know specific routes for getting to their homes and then I usually high tail it out of there as soon as it gets dark. There be beasties in Highgate Woods I hear tell.

But I digress – a little quirk I picked up from Cervantes.

The thing is, while out in the wilds of Neasden I discovered a little piece of India smack bang in the middle of housing and industrial estates.

The Neasden Temple.

It is a wonder to behold. The turrets reach for the heavens and a staircase of astounding proportions leads up to the doors.

I first spotted this wondrous architectural beauty very early on a decidedly cold and wet Tuesday morning, when the dog which needed sitting also required a loo run.

A turreted arch of the temple peeped around the corner of a seriously grotty building. I dragged the reluctant dog along a path which allowed me a less restricted view of this splendour. He's a big dog, so it took quite a bit of doing.

Instantly I was mentally transported to the ruined temple in a scene from The Jungle Book. You must know the one I mean – where Mowgli is held captive by King Louis and Baloo gets kitted out in a weird get up to dance his way into the crazy gig King Louis has going.

And I wondered...

Did someone airlift an entire Hindu temple from temperate jungle to urban jungle?

This is not a silly question. I've seen TV programmes where entire buildings are moved from one location to another.

But yes, I get your point – this would have been an airlift and a half.

In my head I couldn't help substituting a more vibrant setting for this beauty of a temple. I heard the squawk of parrots, the chittering of monkeys; saw the flash of a jaguar's tail duck into the undergrowth; smelt the heady scent of jasmine...

I drew a deep breath - jasmine is my ultimate favourite flower.

What a shame then that I was brought back to my senses with the odour of damp dog and the sound of traffic rapidly swishing by.

But King Louis' song was now trilling its way through my mind. I gave the dog a rendition of it. For some reason his ears went flat against the side of his head and stayed that way until I stopped.

I didn't care about the dog's opinion of my singing. I wasn't auditioning for The Voice now was I?

But suddenly I was tripping my way along the pavement and smiling a whole lot more than I had been in the last few days. And this would certainly have a positive effect on my writing

So you see, ASc does have benefits.

Ask King Louis. I'm sure he'd agree.

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